Father, all my life has been consumed by things that disappoint.
I have chased after joy and satisfaction in many things
And yet none of them have ever been able to fully satisfy my heart.
Some days I believe the lie that the problem lies with me.
Maybe I’m just too broken to find any lasting joy.
Maybe I’ve experienced too much failure
To be happy like others can.
At other times, I believe the lie that you are the problem.
I find it easy to accuse you of not giving me what’s best.
I often feel bitter toward you
For holding out on me with the things I desire.
Father, forgive me for settling for the lifeless waters
Of images of your glory – mere pictures of your goodness
Rather than the living waters that Jesus provides.
Forgive me for pursuing happiness
Rather than pursuing you and holiness.
And give me the eyes to see that true happiness
Lies at the other end of holiness.
Help me to believe that I was created
For more than shallow distractions
And temporary pleasures.
And lead my heart once again
To drink of your living waters
That my heart might truly be satisfied.
For the lingering distractions and lies
That keep me from drinking from that well
I now bring before you and confess...
Father, you are a sure and steady anchor for my heart.
And yet my heart drifts
Because, though I am anchored in you
I easily forget what I've been given
And my wandering heart turns elsewhere for security.
And when I do, my heart believes the lie
That the things of this world
Can make me happy…
Though they never have.
Or I believe the lie that my own righteous intentions
Can put me in a better standing with you.
Or I believe the lie that my own penance
Can atone for the messes I've made
And make me more worthy
Of receiving your grace.
Father, remind me of your promises
That only the pure in heart will ever be happy.
Remind me once again
That my heart was made for you
And that I will always be restless
Until I find my rest in you alone.
For the various lies of happiness that I've been chasing
I now come and confess to you…
Child, though your heart is corrupt
And unable to do what is right,
Here is the provision I have made for you today:
I have sprinkled clean water on you, so you are clean;
I have cleansed you from all your impurities and from all your idols.
I have given you a new heart and have put a new spirit in you;
I have removed from you your heart of stone and given you a heart of flesh.
And I have put my Spirit in you
To move you to follow my decrees
And to be careful to keep my laws.
And I promise to continue to be with you
As you walk through the journey of this life
And to guide you safely to your heavenly home
Until we are reunited face to face.
Father, in my head I know that you are a King
Sitting on your throne
Where everything that happens
Is controlled by you for your own purposes.
And yet I must confess today that I have a fragile heart
That easily forgets that.
I find that I am quick to defend myself
Ready to lash out at injustice
And impatient with people who annoy me.
In fact, I have to admit that I often enjoy
Watching others be exposed for their folly.
And I find life in seeing them get what they deserve.
And even if I’m too polite and civil to act upon it
My heart rejoices in seeing the kind of justice
That spares no mercy
As I watch them suffer in their just desserts.
And yet I cry out for mercy when it comes to my own failings.
I am quick to find excuses for my own bad behavior
And often feel justified that it was necessary in the moment.
Father, forgive me for the insecurity that drives this ugliness.
And grant that I might have a heart
That is as willing to offer mercy to others
As I am to receive it from you.
For the people I’ve judged
And the mercy I’ve withheld
I now come and confess to you…
Child, I thought of you before the world began to breathe
And I knew your name before you came to be
I saw the very day you'd fall away from me
And how desperately you needed to be redeemed
All the shame that separated you from me
Has been paid in full by my own blood.
All the foolishness that separated us
Has been healed through my obedience for you.
Child, if this is true
Then you have nothing to defend.
You have nothing to prove.
You can rest in my love.
You are no longer a slave,
But a son and a daughter!
You are free from needing to prove yourself.
You have been ransomed from your addiction to self.
Who the Son sets free, is free indeed!
You are chosen, not forsaken
I have bought you out of your slavery
And you are now my child.
Believe it!
Rest in it!
Rejoice together!
Father, I understand that I live in a world of darkness
Where what is bad is called good
And what is good is mocked and scorned.
But I also have to confess that the shadows of this darkness
Often creep into the recesses of my own soul.
There are times when my heart is comfortable
Doing and thinking the deeds of darkness
And I find myself justifying them as being ok,
Believing that I can manage them.
But when the shadows shade my heart from your light
I find the darkness to be a safe place to hide.
I shun your presence
And I isolate myself from those around me.
Father, teach me that as a creature of the light
I can no longer play in the shadows
Without becoming consumed myself.
Work within me a deeper hatred for the darkness
And grow my heart’s love for living in the light.
Lighten our darkness, we ask you, O Lord;
And by thy great mercy
Defend us from all perils and dangers of this night;
For the love of your only Son, our Savior Jesus Christ.
Amen.
Father, I magnify the name of Christ
For you, and you alone are worthy of my praise.
And yet, I often find my heart
Distracted by the beauty of temporary pleasures.
And my heart runs to praise
Those things which can never satisfy my longings.
Even when I’m not chasing after other joys
My faith in you tends to be private.
I prefer a quiet faith
That doesn’t stick out
Or face ridicule in the volatile times in which we live.
Father, remind my selfish heart
That a life not lived for your glory
And a character not lived
To actively point others to you
Is a life not worth living.
Teach me that my purpose for being here
Is to be an active agent of salt that preserves my world
And a light that shines into the darkness around me.
And keep me from selfishly walking away from that calling
Because the alternatives are easier.
For the many ways the light of Jesus
Has not shined brightly out of my life, I now confess...
Child, remember today that my love for you
Has nothing to do with how faithful you are to me.
Remind your faithless heart
That I love you because of your faithful brother, Jesus
Who lived and died in your place.
And remember that you are my chosen people,
A royal priesthood, a holy nation, my special possession,
In order that you may declare the praises of the One
Who called you out of darkness into my wonderful light.
Once you were not my child,
But now you are adopted as my cherished son and daughter.
Once you had not received mercy,
But now you are the recipients of my mercy.
Rejoice today that your sins are gone and remembered no more.
Sing, Daughter Zion; shout aloud, Israel!
Be glad and rejoice with all your heart, Daughter Jerusalem!
Rejoice for I have made you clean.
Father, I know that the truly blessed one
Is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked
Or stand in the way that sinners take
Or sit in the company of mockers,
But whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
And who meditates on your law day and night.
But if I’m honest, I have to admit
That more often than not,
My heart thinks of your law as my enemy.
Your law is what keeps me from
Doing many of the things I long to do.
It’s often a condemning finger
Pointing at my failings
And filling me with shame.
Your laws can drive me to hide beneath a façade
That doesn’t want to be exposed as a failure
Or looked upon as somehow less worthy.
Father, help me to see that my fear of the law
Is actually a fear of you.
I’m afraid you will grow weary of my foolishness
Or will reject me as not being worthy of your grace.
Lead my heart to see that everything the law commands
Has been fully met by Jesus for me.
And teach me, therefore, to love your law
Because I love you.
Lead my heart to understand more and more
The freedom I have to fail in trying to keep your commands
And grant that your gracious law
Might lead me each day to die more and more unto my sin
And to live more and more unto your righteousness.
For the many ways I see your law as my enemy instead of my Friend,
I now confess...
Fearful child, hear my words of comfort and assurance today:
For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people.
It teaches you to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions,
And to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,
While you wait for the blessed hope—
The appearing of your great God and Savior, Jesus Christ,
Child, I gave myself for you
To redeem you from all wickedness
And to purify for myself
A people that are my very own, eager to do what is good.
My offer of forgiveness today is not merely the charity
Of offering to look the other way – this time!
But all my wrath against your sin
Has been paid in full by the life and death of my Son.
He lived and died in your place
So that your rightful standing today
Is that of a beloved child,
Fully forgiven, and fully made righteous.
This is the power of the cross:
Though your sins are many
They are taken away and remembered no more!
Father, your word has made it clear
That you want my heart – my passions
And not merely my outward behavior.
And yet I’m amazed at how consumed I am
With doing and saying the right things.
I truly believe that when I act poorly
You will turn your back on me in disappointment.
And when I follow with obedience
I believe your love for me will greatly increase.
My heart naturally believes that by living a good life
I can earn the praise of other people.
And that by living with greater moral consistency
I can have a more confident view of myself.
Forgive me for settling for such shallow views of holiness.
Forgive me for believing that I could so easily appease you.
Forgive me for feeling ok with faking it on the outside
To cover up all the selfish rebellion of my inner thoughts.
In short, forgive me for having such an impotent view of God
That I think I can fake it and fool you.
Father, lead my heart to deeper and deeper levels of holiness.
Help me to see that your laws are not small rules to beat
But pictures of the God who made me
So that I pursue becoming like Jesus
With every fiber of my being.
Father, along with the Psalmist, my heart prays:
Create in me a pure heart, O God,
And renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence
Or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
And grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
For the many ways I’ve faked it before both God and man
I now confess...
Father, I rejoice that your love endures forever,
That it is so rich, it will never run dry on me.
And yet once again, I stand amazed
That my heart is so easily lured
By the passions that rule my heart.
There are lusts that hijack my passions
After just a glimpse.
And there’s a pride of owning for myself
What my eyes can see.
Forgive me for believing the lies
That turn to worthless reflections of your love
When you offer the real thing.
Forgive me for settling for mere pictures
Of what you alone can provide.
Forgive me for being wholly taken up
With promises that can never truly satisfy.
And grant that my eyes would begin to see more clearly
The deeper beauty that lies behind each of these distractions.
Help me to see that they are beautiful
Only because they reflect your true surpassing glory.
Enable me to look through them
To see the ultimate satisfaction
These lesser beauties can only promise,
So that my empty and crushed heart
Can once again be full and complete.
For the many lies of empty passions pursued,
For the many dashed hopes of something I believed could deliver
I now lay before your feet and confess..
Child, if I thought a bit of advice would do
I would have only sent you prophets
And teachers.
I would have filled your day with principles to follow
And rules to keep you in line.
But no amount of advice has the power to rescue you.
You are too sinful to obey my commands.
And though you try, you will always fall short.
What you need is not good advice, but good news.
And here it is:
I sent my Son to do what you never could:
He came to your world to obey the law perfectly
And then to pay the penalty for the many ways you fall short.
This means that though you are still a sinful mess
Your legal debt has been paid in full!
You are now as holy and righteous in my eyes
As my own Son Jesus is.
Your every sin has been nailed to the cross.
And by my Spirit
I am now working IN you
To make the reality of this
More and more true OF you.
So rejoice that your sins are forgiven.
And rejoice that one day
They will no longer hold you down.
You are my child
My beloved,
My bride!
God of Abraham, you're the God of covenant
And of faithful promises.
Time and time again you have proven
You'll do just what You said.
Truly your faithfulness to me is great!
But today I lament the fact that my faithfulness to you
Is not only not great
But it often crumbles into a heap
At the first sign of trouble.
I can sometimes trust you
When I can see a way through
But when you lead me through the valley of the shadow of death
Like Peter, I fear the waves and begin to sink.
No matter how faithful I see that you are
My heart is consumed with self-preservation
And my fears seem greater
Than any promises you have made.
God, I believe in your faithfulness
Help my unbelief!
Work in my heart today
A deeper and deeper trust in your promises
And a deeper and deeper mistrust of my own self-preserving wisdom.
Help me to see and believe
That you are working for a deeper good in me
Than I could ever imagine for myself.
For the many ways I fail to believe that
And act upon it in faith
I now confess...
Child, I know the weakness of your heart
And how difficult it is for you trust.
But you need only look to the cross
To be reminded of my unwavering faithfulness to you.
I didn’t just give you rules to follow
Or a book to guide your way.
Because I know that what your heart needs
Is not the good advice of wisdom
But you need the good news of a Rescuer!
And that is what I came to do!
I have rescued you from the dominion of darkness
And brought you into the kingdom of my beloved Son
Through whom you have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.
Therefore, come to me, all you who are weary and burdened,
And I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
For I am gentle and humble in heart,
And you will find rest for your souls.
Father, I acknowledge that you alone are worthy of praise.
And yet if I look even deeper,
The reality of my life betrays
That I more naturally live for my own praise than for yours.
I love being noticed for my contributions
And am often filled with silent resentment
When it goes unpraised.
I justify safe boundaries around me
That protect my time and my money,
Because deep in my heart
I really believe it is mine to dispense.
Even worse, I never let a challenge to go unmet
Without trying to manage the seething rage
That anybody would dare to cross me
Or attempt to take advantage of me.
I hate looking the part of the fool
And yet I’m weary of the efforts it takes
To shore up my sagging ego.
Forgive me for so often acting
As if I am the god who has been betrayed.
Forgive me for failing to see
The true Advocate and Justifier of my heart.
And grant that my heart would learn to rest
More and more in the righteous deeds of my Savior
Rather than in the self-righteous substitutes
That can never cover the fears of my heart.
For the many ways I’ve played the victim
And sought vengeance rather than justice
I now confess to you...
O child, you’ve been running and hiding from me
Since that day in the Garden
When you lost the cover of my loving protection.
But here’s the good news for you today:
I have never stopped pursuing you
Since that day either!
And my pursuit has overtaken your nakedness.
For my Son chased down your greatest enemy:
Death!
And I have clothed you in the perfect righteousness
Of his life lived in your place.
And his death has paid for your rebellion in full!
And I know you still FEEL naked and vulnerable
Because the old sinful nature
Has not yet been shed
By crossing the great divide of death.
But here’s my promise to you today:
In my eyes, you are already that clothed.
You are perfect and holy and beautiful in my sight.
And one day, I will allow you to see
The wondrous beauty that you are
When all vestiges of sin and self
Are once and for all destroyed!
Rejoice, then, and lift your praises!
For your loving Father is full of lovingkindness
And my mercies will never end!
Father, though I surrender my ambitions
And ask that your will be done in my life,
It’s clear that my heart struggles with that;
Especially when difficult people come into my life.
Some people are just hard to love.
Some people not only annoy me
But they bring out the very worst in my heart.
And at times, the defensive rage
That wells up in my heart
Is more than I can suppress.
And my lips give expression
To the true nature of my selfish heart.
Father, forgive me for the moments of bitter defensiveness
That reveal just how self-protective I am;
How self-promoting my heart longs to be;
How truly in love with myself that I actually am!
O Father, give me the eyes to see
That every bitter reaction to another person
Only masks the many ways I do the very same things.
Show me how my self-righteous vindication
Is really just compensating for the guilt I feel
When those same tendencies are revealed in my own heart.
And lead my heart to see once again
How your amazing grace has rescued me
From my own selfish folly,
That I might have renewed patience and compassion
For my brothers and sisters who struggle like I do.
Child, if I treated you as your sin deserved
Your selfish heart would be exposed and condemned.
But I am a gracious and compassionate God
Slow to anger, and abounding in mercy.
And rather than condemning you
For trying protecting yourself in this world
I have chosen to come to earth
In order to be your protection.
I sent my Son to live each day on earth
With all the moral perfection you owe to me.
And then I graciously credited all that obedience
To your spiritual account.
And when your obsession with self
Drove you from my presence in the Garden
My Son willingly paid for your rebellion
By dying in your place upon the cross.
What all this means is
Child, you can stop running!
All your insecurities and fears
Are forever satisfied!
You are my perfect, holy, righteous, beautiful child.
Behold what manner of great love I have lavished on you,
That you should be called children of God!
And that is what you are!
Father, I want to believe
That all the poor and powerless find rest
In the promise of your goodness.
But there are days when
When that rest seems like an empty dream.
I’m either too full of myself
That my pride weakens my patience with others.
Or I’m so empty of anything even resembling self
That I struggle to believe I’m worth rescuing.
Father, help me to stop looking at my life
Through the lens of who I think I am,
Or what I long to be.
Help me to stop listening to the voices
Of shame and failure that crowd my thoughts.
And enable me to believe
That I am who you say I am.
Renew my heart to no longer be defined
By the cheers or the rejections of others
But only by your pursuing love for me.
Help me to believe it
To hang on to it
And to find rest in it.
Help me now to cling to that grace
As I pour out my heart and its fears to you...
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